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John Goodman is either as shocked as the rest of us that "Roseanne" completely smashed the ratings in its return to TV screens across America ... or he just doesn't care.

We got John at LAX -- who was recast in his old role as Roseanne's hubby, in a revival season that premiered on ABC Tuesday night -- and his response to "Roseanne" churning out a whopping 18.2 million viewers was, well, oddly anticlimactic ... to say the least.

Our photog asks if he expected such a YUGE turnout -- seeing how the show now features Roseanne as a Trump voter and her sis on team HC. He says it quite simply ... not really. John also doesn't think the show's too political now either, as some have suggested.

Janice Dickinson will be among the 5 women who will testify against Bill Cosby in his upcoming rape trial ... TMZ has learned.

The judge in the case has allowed prosecutors to call 5 women to show an M.O. on the part of Cosby.

Janice claims in 1982 Cosby drugged and sexually assaulted her in Lake Tahoe. She says when she woke up her pajamas were off and there was semen between her legs.

The alleged victim in the case, Andrea Constand, also claims she was drugged and sexually assaulted in 2004.

Corey Feldman has a detailed story about a group of men that were following his car Tuesday night before yanking his door open and stabbing him with a sharp object, and Corey thinks this might be an intimidation tactic over his recent claims that he was victim of pedophilia.

Corey tells TMZ he was driving home from dinner with his security guard when he noticed a car on the freeway driving so erratically it caused a crash. Corey says he got off the freeway and soon noticed a car was following him -- a car that looked like the one with the erratic driver on the freeway.

He says his security guard had words with someone in the other car and, when Corey was stopped at a red light, the passengers in the other car made their move. Corey says one of the guys pulled his door open and jabbed him one time with a sharp object -- either the tip of a knife or a syringe.

Corey says the puncture was small and drew a tiny bit of blood, but he was concerned enough to go to the hospital, where police came and debriefed him and his security guard.

The Dodgers are going for a clean sweep -- not of their Opening Day opponents, the Giants -- but of the waste water that seeped onto the Dodgers Stadium field.

Sources inside the L.A. County Dept. of Health tell TMZ Sports ... inspectors were roaming the third baseline area next to the dugout Wednesday ... checking out the disgusting mud patch left behind after Tuesday night's sewage spill.

If ya missed it, Big Blue's exhibition game against the Angels was cut short when a waste water pipeline burst, sending up a stench worse than Yu Darvish's World Series outings.

We're told that section of the field had to be vacuumed, and the material shipped off to a waste disposal facility. Then the area was doused with chlorine, lye and other antibacterial chemicals. The Dept. of Health will make another inspection on Thursday morning ... ahead of the Opening Day festivities.

If you're going to the game, that's bleach you're smelling. And maybe a little left over from Yu.

DMX is heading back to prison for 12 months for tax evasion, and, in a way, it's good news.

X addressed the judge directly Wednesday in the NYC courtroom, and took responsibility for his actions. He said he was too old to be doing the things he's doing, and admitted he hasn't been thinking straight.

The judge gave him 1 year behind bars, to be followed by 3 years of supervised release. As TMZ first reported, federal prosecutors were pushing for the max sentence -- 5 years in the slammer -- to send a message to the rapper, especially after he failed a drug test while he was out on bond and got sent back to jail.

During sentencing, X's attorney, Murray Richman, played the rapper's music video for "Slippin'" to show how tough DMX's life has been.

J Lo and A-Rod's latest purchase screams they're in this thing for the long haul -- or maybe just the kick-ass views from their new home ... the first they've bought together.

We got these pics of the $15.3 million apartment the couple just snapped up, and the place is insane. It's 4,000 sq ft, 3 bedrooms, 4.5 bathrooms and that's all inside the 432 Park Avenue -- known as the world's tallest residential building.

We kinda got the feeling they'd get a pad together, since J Lo put her 26th Street penthouse on the market for $27 million last October. Btw, Alex and Jen didn't even break the bank, as far as this building is concerned. A Saudi retail mogul reportedly bought the penthouse for $87.7 million!

Groupon's got a major mishap to deal with after a racial slur appeared on its site for a listing for women's boots ... and it started by issuing an apology.

Screenshots from outraged customers started making the rounds on social media Wednesday, showing a listing for Women's Fringed Suede Moccasin Boots with the color described as "N***er Brown." The color description also showed up on other boot listings on the site.

Shortly afterward, the VP of Global Communications for the company issued a statement, saying "We are appalled that this language was displayed on our site ... this is completely unacceptable and violates our policies -- to say nothing of our values."

He added that Groupon immediately removed the product and the third-party seller who listed it from its marketplace once it was made aware of the racial slur.

Despite the mea culpa ... many people are pissed and some are calling for an online boycott.

Abby Lee Miller is stretching her legs in her new digs on day 1 of her post-prison life.

We got these pics of Abby walking around a common area Wednesday morning at the Los Angeles-area halfway house where she's now a resident. The Residential Reentry Center will prep the "Dance Moms" star for a return to civilian life.

As TMZ first reported, Abby checked into the facility on Tuesday ... and will be getting counseling ahead of her May 25 release date. She has been serving her time for tax fraud since last July in the Victorville, CA prison.

Justin Bieber is showing compassion for folks who are down on their luck ... and this could have religious overtones.

Bieber was spotted Wednesday plopping himself down onto an L.A. sidewalk after a SoulCycle sesh to chat up a homeless man and woman who were sleeping on the pavement.

We're not sure what he was talking to them about, but he was clearly interested in what they had to say ... and was in no rush to wrap up the convo.

Danny Amendola and Olivia Culpo are back on the market ... 'cause the couple has officially called it quits after a 2-year relationship.

There's been speculation surrounding their status over the past week after both sides scrubbed each other from their Instagrams ... which is always an early sign of a trip to Splitsville.

O.C. confirmed the news with Access Hollywood on Wednesday ... saying "We are broken up and it's just so fresh for me. I really don't feel comfortable talking about it."

The 32-year-old Danny and 25-year-old Olivia first met randomly while walking the streets of Hollywood back in 2016 ... and shared a memorable kiss on the field after D.A. helped the Pats win the 2018 AFC Championship game.

It's a sad day for fans of the relationship, but on the bright side ... these 2 hotties will probably find new love in no time.

The woman accusing Nelly of rape checked into a hospital over concerns she is coming apart emotionally ... TMZ has learned.

Sources close to the situation tell us ... Monique Greene had a phone conversation with a friend last Thursday, and the friend hung up feeling Monique was severely distressed. We're told the friend called police and asked them to make a welfare check on Monique.

Emergency personnel responded and we're told they felt it was best to take Greene to a hospital. She agreed to go voluntarily. She was there for a few hours in the evening before being released. Our sources say there were no signs or talk of suicide.

Greene's attorney, Karen Koehler, tells us the friend who called cops was worried about Monique's "continuing severe emotional distress related to the alleged Nelly rape and the aftermath."

We broke the story ... Greene's suing the rapper for sexual assault and defamation, and she's also accused Nelly of similar sexual misconduct against 2 other women.

Jared Fogle's making a new desperate attempt to be released from federal prison, and this time he's calling on President Trump ... even though he's completely misguided. Fogle, that is.

The convicted child pornographer filed a petition for a writ of habeus corpus. In non-Latin, that's a direct appeal for his jailer to release him. As we've extensively reported, Fogle has already made multiple appeals to judges to let him out ... which have all been shot down.

As with previous appeals, Fogle has come to believe the conspiracy charge against him is BS -- and in docs, obtained by TMZ, he says he never would've pled guilty had he known back then.

It's a totally futile effort, most likely, but here's what's really weird. Fogle's supposed to file this document against the warden of his prison, which he did, but he also included the Prez as a respondent ... complete with 1600 Pennsylvania Ave on the document.

Maybe he's hoping for a pardon, but that would require filing a totally different document.

7:45 AM PT -- Law enforcement now tells us, Corey told police he believed he was being followed. At some point, Corey's bodyguard, who was a passenger in his car, shined a flashlight toward the other car. At the next light, one of the guys in the car that was following Corey got out and confronted the bodyguard. Another guy went to the driver's side and Corey says the guy stabbed him with some sort of syringe or other sharp object and then the car took off. Cops now say there is some sort of mark on Corey's abdomen.

Cops believe it was a road rage incident and the call went out as an assault with a deadly weapon.

6:45 AM PT -- Corey told the police the attacker appeared to be following him, and whatever the person allegedly stabbed him with was "long and sharp." We're told he feared it was a syringe, and went to the hospital to make sure he hadn't been injected with something.

6:20 AM PT -- Law enforcement sources tell us, although Feldman claims he was stabbed, there was no evidence of a laceration ... no cut to his abdomen. Cops tell us they don't know if Corey suffered any other injuries, but there was nothing visible on his body. He was admitted to the hospital in stable condition.

Corey Feldman has been hospitalized after he says a total stranger stabbed him in the abdomen and then escaped.

Corey says he was stopped at a traffic light Tuesday night in L.A.'s San Fernando Valley -- with a security guard -- when 3 men approached the car. He says while his security was distracted by the 3 guys, a car pulled up and another attacker jumped out, stabbed him and fled the scene.

Corey rushed to a hospital after the attack, and that's when LAPD was informed of the attack. Cops are now investigating, but Corey thinks he knows who's responsible.

He says he's been getting online threats from some group of people he refers to as the "Wolfpack." Corey adds, "I have reason to believe it's all connected! Enough is enough!"

"Teen Mom" star Ryan Edwards really killed the mood -- one day after he and his wife announced they're expecting their first child, he went and got his ass arrested.

Law enforcement sources tell us ... the 30-year-old was busted Tuesday at his house in Tennessee when cops executed a warrant for violating probation. We're told he posted bail Wednesday morning. He's already on probation for a previous heroin case.

Ryan reportedly had a $10k-a-week heroin addiction before going to rehab -- and MTV cameras captured him slurring his speech and falling asleep at the wheel on his way to his wedding last year.

Kyle Richards is relieved Paris Hilton found her $2 million engagement ring -- but she's even more emphatic about her niece protecting her fortune when she walks down the aisle.

We got the 'Real Housewives' star Tuesday night leaving Craig's in WeHo and asked what she thought about Paris almost losing her expensive bling while partying. Kyle says she told Paris about taking care of that hardware -- she offered a permanent solution.

In case you were wondering, Odell Beckham Jr. is STILL dancing ... and this time he's using the art of movement to send a message to all of his haters to LEAVE HIM THE HELL ALONE.

Beckham has been going through it lately ... there's a multi-million dollar lawsuit that's been filed against him, a video that ALLEGEDLY shows him doing some bad stuff, plus all those pesky NY Giants trade rumors.

OBJ's seemingly addressing the controversy with the dance ... popping up on NFL player Shane Wynn's IG story dancing to one of hottest songs in hip-hop -- Flipp Dinero's "Leave Me Alone."

As always, his moves are A1, and the song is a banger ... but will anyone listen?